6 Lessons Learned

It has been 18 months since I was called to be bishop and this post will discuss the top 6 things I've learned in my service thus far. I am learning more and more every day and still feel severely inadequate for the calling but have learned a few lessons along the way that have helped me.

Lesson #1 - The mantle of bishop is absolutely real!

There is no possible way I could say the things I say and do the things I do without the amazing mantle which accompanies being bishop. It is very hard to explain the feelings that come into my heart and thoughts that come into my mind as I meet with members of the ward. Most of the time, I have no idea why a member wants to meet with me and completely trust that Heavenly Father will guide and direct me. They come in and we begin with a prayer. We pray that the spirit will guide us in our discussion and will inspire us to act on the impressions received. Without fail, the Spirit comes and directs me. Sometimes it's scriptures I've recently read that come to mind or a recent conference talk that might help (I always try and use the words of the prophets as they're much better than mine). Other times I feel impressed to not say anything at all and just listen. Once they've finished speaking, if the thoughts aren't there, I'll ask members for more time to seek guidance from the Spirit and come back to them at a later time with counsel. I always hope members don't think that I'm side-stepping their questions or concerns. I just know that I can't do anything without the Spirit and want the counsel to come from Heavenly Father and not me. I can definitely tell the difference between my thoughts and His thoughts. In Isaiah 55:8 we read that "my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways..." The mantle of bishop allows me to distinguish between His thoughts and my thoughts and His ways and my ways.

Lesson #2 - Heavenly Father loves us more than we can possibly comprehend.

Another great blessing of the mantle of bishop are the feelings that overcome me as members sit across the desk from me or as I gaze across the congregation during sacrament meeting, searching the faces of those who might need help. I have never felt in my life, to this degree, the amount of love I have for God's children, especially those under my stewardship. The only explanation I have is that, through this mantle, Heavenly Father wants me to feel a small portion of the love He has for each of us so that it can spill off of me and onto those I meet with. When I try and explain it to members, if the hearts of the members are opened, the Spirit helps carry those words to their hearts and they begin to feel His love. 

Why does the adversary want those who sin to hide and not see their bishop? I'm convinced it's because he doesn't want them to feel of this love. Every time a brother or sister humbly confesses their sins, I feel an IMMENSE amount of joy and love for that individual. Not joy for the sin, but the joy our Heavenly Father has when His children decide to come unto the Savior and partake of His atonement. I know that Heavenly Father loves ALL of His children, no matter what struggles or trials they're facing. I feel that love every day. As I look at my own boys and know of the unconditional love I have for them, I'm in awe at the perfect love our Heavenly Father has for us, no matter what we've done.

Lesson #3 - The atonement of Jesus Christ can heal anything.

I learned very quickly the importance of the atonement of Jesus Christ and its power to cure Heavenly Father's children of life's ills. No matter what struggles, trials, or afflictions we're going through, the atonement is there to help us through it. No matter the height of the seemingly insurmountable tasks that fall in front of us on a daily basis, the atonement can scale them. No matter the amount of hurt and pain we feel in our lives (either emotional or physical), the atonement can heal it. No matter the depth of how far someone has fallen, the atonement can reach us. I've seen the miracles that happen in our lives as we learn HOW to apply the atonement every day to life's difficulties. As we make and keep sacred covenants, we yoke ourselves with the Savior and our burdens become light, "for [His] yoke is easy." When we break covenants and try and do things on our own in our own way, without the help of the Savior, that's when life can get difficult and our burdens become too heavy to bear. If you or someone you know feels the heaviness of life's burdens, the invitation is always there to come unto Savior and learn of Him and His atonement. The Savior's atonement is one of life's greatest gifts that is severely under-utilized. 

Lesson #4 - Today's youth have been saved for generations to come to earth and are absolutely incredible!

I decided very early as bishop to spend as much time as I can with the youth. They are the most amazing kids I've ever been around. Every time I'm around them, I feel strengthened and revitalized to do this work with more vigor and faith. With all of the wickedness around us, I see so much good in our youth and what they're asked to do. Before coming to this earth, Heavenly Father knew how much we could handle and how much we couldn't. He's sent these kids to earth today, in a world full of filth, dishonesty, and moral decay, because He knew they were strong enough to handle it and they could balance the wickedness with their goodness. They read their scriptures and pray on their own, because they know it will help them and they'll feel closer to their Heavenly Father. They are doing family history work and going to the temple because they trust in the promises given to them that they will be "protected against the intensifying influence of the adversary" in their lives. I see them reaching out and lifting those whose heads and hands hang down because they want to follow the example of the Savior and do what He would do. I love our youth, the rising generation, and know the future of this great work is in good hands!

Lesson #5 - The little things matter more today than they ever have before.

One of the biggest difference I see between those who seem to struggle in life and those who don't are those who are focused on doing the little things on a daily basis to strengthen their testimony and their faith and those who are not. Now, this does NOT mean that those who are doing the little things are exempt from life's difficulties. It simply means they are able to submit cheerfully to the will of the Lord, no matter what that will is. They have yoked themselves with Him and are striving to keep the covenants they've made on a minute by minute basis. Most marital problems begin with couples neglecting their scripture study and daily prayers. Most couple prayers and scripture study are neglected because individual spouses (either one of them or both of them) aren't doing their personal study and saying their personal prayers. The busyness of life tends to get in the way of the little things (i.e. FHE, personal and family scripture study and prayer, date nights, temple trips, etc.). With how fast paced life is getting with increased technology and the sense of immediate gratification, it is more vital today than ever to slow down and focus on the things that matter most; your family and your "spiritual" self. 

Lesson #6 - Pornography will destroy a family and a person faster than almost anything else.

I knew that pornography was awful before being bishop, but had no idea how destructive it is. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World, the first presidency declared that "the family is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His children." If the family is central to Heavenly Father's plan, the destruction of it is central to the adversary's plan. He is using pornography as his main tool in trying to destroy families. Pornography goes against almost everything I've just written about:

1.    Pornography blinds sons and daughters of God to the love He has for them. While viewing pornography and being stuck in its awful grasp, the Holy Ghost leaves and Satan fills that individual with lies about how horrible they are and how much God doesn't love them for what they've done. He tells them to run and hide and never tell anyone of what they're doing; and thus they spiral down into a deep hole.

2.   The adversary tells those addicted that they can overcome it alone, by themselves, without the help of the atonement of Jesus Christ or their bishop. This is a flat out lie! Those stuck within its' grasp MUST reach for the atonement to free themselves of the heavy chains of addiction that hold them bound. They cannot do it alone and most definitely need the power of the atonement to help them break through these chains.

3.    Because he's trying to destroy families, he's heavily targeting our youth and trying to destroy the creation of future families. He knows that if he can get a youth addicted, they may not go on missions or be very effective missionaries once they're in the field. If addicted, they may not want to get married in the temple or, for that matter, even get married at all. Through pornography, the great deceiver fills or youth with lies about who they really are and he blinds them to the potential they have. We must do all we can to protect the rising generation against this plague.

4.    Finally, President Ezra Taft Benson once taught that the adversary knows he may not get people to go out and commit great sins of commission right off the bat (ie. killing, committing adultery, stealing, etc.) so he strands them with little sins of omission to get them "past feeling." If we are not acting on a daily basis on the little things, pornography can creep in to anyone's life. It is no respecter of persons, age, gender, or otherwise. We must continually focus on the little things in order to keep ourselves alert to the temptations of Satan. In 1 Nephi 15:24, we read the following about the importance of reading the scriptures:

"And I said unto them that it was the word of God; and whoso would hearken unto the word of God, and would hold fast unto it, they would never perish; neither could the temptations and the fiery darts of the adversary overpower them unto blindness, to lead them away to destruction."

I'm so humbled by the experiences I'm having as bishop. I feel so inadequate but trust that Heavenly Father will direct me. It is such a rewarding time for my family and me. I know that I'm nothing without my Heavenly Father and try and do whatever I can in my life to ensure I have His Spirit to be with me. I love my Heavenly Father and His son, Jesus Christ and am doing all I can to help others feel of His love.