The need for "Real Men" in today's homes

In the world we live in today, I often hear the phrase “be a man” but it’s followed by stereotypes of what the world believe men should be (stern, unemotional, tough, strong, etc.). I believe the following are true characteristics of “real men”:

Real men know how to be romantic and cheesy – Too many times men think about the image they’re portraying to their buddies or the world around them and forget about the person they should be trying to please the most; their eternal companion. Because of this “protecting image” attitude, they don’t allow themselves to be vulnerable and silly. They quickly forget about the romantic and crazy things they did to win the heart of their sweetheart. Real men win the hearts of their sweetheart throughout their whole lives, not just when they exchanged rings. They buy flowers or chocolates unexpectedly, for no obvious reason. They think of romantic things to do for milestones in the marriage, whether they have money or not. They search out ways to be creative because they know their wife would love it, even if it’s not in their nature to be creative. Real men date their wives their whole lives.

Real men know how to cook, clean, and do laundry – There is a false idea out in the world today that says that it’s a man’s privilege to come home to a perfectly, cleaned home, with dinner ready to go on the table. After dinner, they can kick up their legs and relax after a hard day’s work. This may have been the way things were “way back when” but it’s not the way things are today. The work that goes on at home is just as rigorous (if not more) than the work that goes on in the world. Real men take over cooking responsibilities when they can see their wives have had a rough day with the kids. After dinner is over, real men tell their honeys to take a rest while they clean up the dishes, take out the garbage, and pick up the toys. When real men see their wives bringing up a load of laundry to fold, they sit down next to her and fold clothes with her, followed by a nice back massage.

Real men help their wives spread their wings and fly – Just as men have dreams of becoming something great in the world today, so do women. Real men help their wives realize their dreams and aspirations. They help them develop hobbies and talents that allow them to spread their wings and fly. Just as wives allow husbands to golf, ski, and go to sporting events, real men allow their wives to go to craft parties, plays, and girl’s nights out. Even though being a mother is a sacred responsibility, women need outlets and “adult” time as much as men do.

Real men sacrifice – With the world we live in of big egos and making more money to get ahead, real men learn the value of sacrifice. Real men may pass up a higher paying promotion at work because it would take them away from precious moments with their family. They sacrifice the bigger promotion to see Tommy’s first hit and Lucy’s first piano recital. They sacrifice sleep to care for a sick little one while mother slumbers. Real men sacrifice whatever is needed to ensure his wife’s needs are being met above his own.

Real men know how to play with Barbies and race-cars – No amount of money or toys that money can buy will compensate for the time a father spends sitting down and playing with his kids. Dads who are consumed by work or other responsibilities and neglect these precious opportunities to play with their kids are missing out on valuable opportunities to develop relationships of trust that will be vital for when their children are teenagers and adults. There are very few times where little boys or girls are as excited than when their daddy sits down to play with them. Once these little ones are teenagers or adults, they will seek advice from those who played race-cars or Barbies with them when they were younger, not the stranger that now wants to be a part of their lives.

Real men read to their kids – There is nothing more exciting to a little boy than having his real-life hero read him books about super-heroes in masked faces and capes, using voices high and low, gruff and soft! There is nothing more precious to a little girl than having her life’s protector tell her stories about far off lands with princes and princesses.  Dr. Seuss penned, “The more you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.” Real men want their kids to go far in life and will take the time to read to them often.

Real men cry, smile, and laugh often – Too often we hear of men who are heartless, angry, and just plain mean. Some men in the world today feel that in order to get ahead in life, it’s important to not show your emotions. They are mean at work and are mean at home, allowing their lack of emotion to ruin the innocence of their children and break the hearts of their wives. Real men understand that crying breaks down any walls to the heart and allows others to see the dreams, fears, and aspirations that are hidden inside. Real men come to grips that it’s okay to allow others to see the inside of their heart, especially their wife and children. Real men play Santa Claus, tooth fairy, and Easter Bunny for their children because they know that imagination is the beginning of big dreaming and big dreams equate to future success. Real men turn their kid’s frowns upside down through the tickle monster.

Real men teach their kids through example – Too many times dads yell at their kids to do what they say and not what they do. There’s nothing more important in life than a father’s quiet example to his children. If you want your children to pray, they need to find their father on his knees. If you want your children to be nice and neighborly, they need to see their father helping a neighbor in need. If you want your children to be kind to the disadvantaged and disabled, they need to see their father going out of his way to open a door for someone in a wheel chair. Most importantly, if you want your sons to show respect and love to women, they need to see their father love their mother.

If you believe the world is in need of “real men,” please feel free to pass this message along.


Image of Dad Holding Hands Courtesy of Michelle Meiklejohn/FreeDigitalPhotos.net